August is here.
August 2020 was supposed to be special. August 14 is my 10-year wedding anniversary. We were going to take a family trip to Vancouver, which is where Jason and I had our honeymoon.
But now, we’re just bracing ourselves for what will probably be the hardest season in our lives: doing school at home with a 2nd grader and a kindergartener.
Now we’re not so worried about Eva. She survived the last third of 1st grade with worksheets and weekly Zoom calls with her teacher. I’m confident she’ll be fine, especially since both she and the school will be more prepared for distance learning. Yeah, it will still suck that she can’t see her friends, and yes, she’ll probably have a few meltdowns like we did last semester, but she’ll get into the rhythm.
I’m more concerned about Abby. We’re lucky in that we were able to have her in preschool for several years, which means she knows what it’s like to be in a classroom setting. But transitioning from a play-based classroom to a learning-focused kindergarten class will be tough. How will she adjust to Zoom meetings? I’m sure it’ll be novel and fun in the beginning, but what about at week 3? 7? 12?
I’ll probably have to sit with her for the Zoom meetings. Let’s say they have a one-hour lesson every day. That’s 5 hours of sitting next to her, helping her, making her focus, etc. It’s a lot of time. (And LAUSD seems to want to have the elementary kids do about 3 hours of live/video sessions a day!!!)
And so I’m worried. I’m concerned about what my life will look like once school starts again. I’m very concerned about my productivity. I’ve finally gotten into a rhythm, but all of that will go out the window once fall comes.
A few thoughts:
It’s going to be hard no matter what. I have to be realistic. School is going to suck for working parents. It just is. Jason and I both work from home, which is a huge bonus for us. But what about those families where both parents work?
My productivity is going to go down. This is also inevitable. I will lose both time and mental energy. I have to be okay with that.
Remembering those two things are key to surviving.
I can ask for help.
I can let things go.
Beceause if there’s anything I’ve learned in this pandemic, it’s that I am not in control. In fact, there is very little that is in my control. But if I believe that there is Someone in control and that Someone is so, so good, then maybe I can ask for help. Maybe I can let things go.
So please pray for me. Pray for all the teachers, staff, and parents out there. PRAY FOR THE KIDS.
One bright note from this summer: Taylor Swift’s new album. I know, I know, most of you are NOT Taylor Swift fans, but PLEASE HEAR ME OUT. There are just THREE songs you need to hear from this album. Please give them a chance.
exile — feat. Bon Iver
This is definitely one of the best songs in the album. It’s about a failed relationship, and in the verses and the duelling chorus, you see why the relationship failed.
august
The perfect nostalgic, end-of-summer song. Whether you’re nostalgic about a past love OR missing our pre-pandemic times, this is a song you can belt out. Such clever wordplay in this one. It’s one that I always end up repeating because I want to relive it again and again.
illicit affairs
I do not condone extramarital affairs nor cheating on your significant other. But I do highly recommend this song. It is sparse, yet highly evocative. The bridge is phenomenal and I belt it out (often to Jason lol) every time it comes around.
This album is a departure from some of her more pop-focused albums that she created to be more stadium friendly. It is more of a mood album, so there are no big swings in sound, tempo, or instrumentation. It’s melancholy, wistful, and hopeful, with added notes of smouldering anger and pain. It’s great for driving. It’s just really good songwriting. I highly recommend it.
Write to you later!